We and Our Children

We and Our Children

“We know that we are of God, and the whole world lies under the sway of the wicked one.” 1 John 5:19. “Look at the fig tree, and all the trees. When they are already budding, you see and know for yourselves that summer is now near. So you, likewise, when you see these things happening, know that the kingdom of God is near.” Luke 21:29-31.

We are now living in the wintertime. It is cold, and the evil holds sway. “The whole world lies under the sway of the wicked one.” But we are of God. We have God’s kingdom—summer—within us. As unrighteousness increases, most men’s love will grow cold. In other words, in our time winter usually overpowers summer. But not in everyone. By the Holy Spirit we have power to overcome the evil, so that God’s kingdom—summer—can grow within us. Then the warmth that we possess can radiate to all with whom we come in contact. Our calling is to overcome evil with good. Rom. 12:21.

Since most people are married and have families, preserving the “summer” within our own hearts is only part of the task. We are building a home, and that home is to be an extension of God’s kingdom. Like an island in the sea, our home should be a place where summer prevails, right in the midst of winter. We must see to it that Christ, as the Sun of Righteousness, can shine without hindrance in the home. Mal. 4:2.

When a baby is born into a family, it is like a ray of sunshine from heaven. You notice that clearly when the child begins to smile. When the child smiles at you, you can feel the warmth. There is no struggle in the infant against the evil. There is rest and peace in his smile. Yet he has inherited an evil nature from his forefathers, and it doesn’t take long before the struggle begins. And when it begins, it is essential for the parents to fight the good fight of faith so that the cold doesn’t triumph over the warmth, so that their smile to their child doesn’t disappear. If it does disappear, the child’s smile (which, as you remember, so warmed your heart) will also disappear and he will become timid or withdrawn. If this happens, it is because you haven’t understood to fight the good fight of faith.

He who loves his son chastens him early. The child doesn’t understand to take up the battle against the evil nature he has inherited from his forefathers. Therefore, he must be helped by chastisement. Chastisement is not to be punishment, but help.

The evil nature in a child awakens the evil nature of its parents, and thus the cold usually gains entrance. You want the child to be obedient, but you don’t understand to put to death your own nature—the dictator in you.

A child has five senses that need to develop, but he understands nothing of what he sees and encounters here in the world into which he has been born. If the child is healthy, he will be continually active when he isn’t asleep. This can be troublesome for the parents. Many things can get broken, even things that most people regard as precious. Yet it is only the child that is truly precious. If you value earthly possessions and your own convenience more highly than you do your child, you won’t understand how to chastise him.

The child may do much that is wrong without having done anything with evil intent. It is only to be expected that a child will do many things wrong during the time his senses are developing. It is essential for the child’s learning and development that he be active; this should be a joy for you to see; but it is also the parents’ responsibility to guide the child’s activities and development.

To be able to chasten the child correctly, you must first of all understand whether his bad behavior was a manifestation of his nature or whether it proceeded from his heart. Most importantly you must take care that your smile toward the child does not wane, so that the warmth of summer can be preserved in the home. This is the parents’ responsibility, not the child’s.

Parents are different. Some possess more strong personality traits. They emphasize chastisement. They are strong personalities and insist on obedience. However, they often forget to sow the good seed—to simply talk with the child. They also forget that warmth is a necessary element for the seed to grow. Thus an ever-widening gulf develops between parent and child as the child grows up, because their hearts have not been united.

Other parents possess more lenient personality traits. They neglect the chastening and don’t see the danger of the evil nature the child has inherited. They are lax, and the child gets no help in denying himself and no understanding of discerning between good and evil. Today, the danger of being weak is much greater than the danger of being too strict. But the weak also forget to sow the good seed. By giving in to the child, they think that the child will love them. On the contrary; the child despises them and begins to rule over his parents precisely because the parents have not chastened the child. It is fairly common in these days that the children rule in the homes.

The older women are to teach the young women to love their husbands and their children. Titus 2:4. The spirit of the times today is one of equality. Wives want to go everywhere with their husbands. They want to be on committees and have a say in everything. However, children hinder them in all these activities and require that they stay at home. Yet they don’t want to be without children, because then the home and life would be too empty. But they definitely do not want many children. They do not love children. They think only of themselves. Therefore they must learn to love their children.

As children get a little older, and the parents take them to meetings or other places, the parents have to teach the children to be quiet so they won’t create a disturbance. Not everyone is equally successful in doing this, and so the parents chastise the children. However, the children are often tired and are actually not accountable for their behavior. Instead of being disciplined, they should simply be put to bed. If mothers loved their children, they would gladly have taken their children home with them, or stayed home with them, so that the children wouldn’t have been exposed to such pressures. They would have rejoiced to have this responsibility for the children and not considered it an inferior task. What is inferior is for a woman to leave the home and enter the husband’s ministry. If she wants to win the crown of life, she can only win it in her area of responsibility as a woman, not in the area of a man’s responsibilities. Then, “Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her.” Prov. 31:28.

Jesus says, “Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God.” Matt. 4:4. If parents don’t plant God’s Word in their children’s hearts, the children will have no understanding of how to resist the influences they are exposed to in the neighborhood and at school. And if parents don’t have God’s Word to give their children as a basis for their teaching and chastisement, they are building their house on sand. Without God’s Word, parents have no light in which to overcome their own nature, nor are they then able to help their children.

As a rule, children receive more than enough food and clothing, but it is only by God’s Word that we can have the light and power to keep the cold out of our homes so that when the children are out among people and are exposed to the coldness, it will be a joy for them to return to the warmth of their home. Only by the power of God’s Word can a warm smile between the parents and children be preserved.

Without chastisement, of which all true children receive their share, there is confusion, and in confusion there is no peace. Heb. 12:5-11. “God is not the author of confusion but of peace . . . .” 1 Cor. 14:33. Where there is confusion, evil spirits gain entrance and power.

Everyone in whose heart the kingdom of God is growing and who has the power to preserve the warmth in the home, can be along in building the church. Those who are single and who have the warmth of “summer” in their hearts can also build the church and help in the homes they visit by being an example that allows the children to taste and see that God is good. Then the church can also be like a “tropical island” in the midst of the ocean of humanity; people can come out of the cold into the warmth. In the warmth of the church our children are to have their future as members of Christ’s body, and they can thus be saved from the perverse generation.

When Jesus returns as Lord—the Sun of Righteousness—the “summer” that we have in our hearts, in our homes, and in the church will then cover the whole earth. That will be the Millennium.